How to set up a ‘real’ live gay sex venue: Exploring ideas

Is there any way to go about setting up a CMNM (or, for that matter, just plain NM) scenario with guys you know–without freaking them out? I know a guy or two I might like to have such a scenario with (maybe with some touching or contact but not necessarily any sex), but I don’t know how to actually go about approaching the issue in such a way that I don’t inadvertently transgress any of their personal boundaries and/or make them uncomfortable.

Like, my roommate, for example. I’d like to be naked around him or with him, but I can’t very well say “Hey, dude, can we hang out naked sometime?” That might really weird him out. But, if there were the potential for him to be open to it, it would be something I’d want to do. But, I don’t know how to approach the issue at all. I don’t how to approach it in a way that I could find out if he’d be open to it without simultaneously risking offending him or making him uncomfortable. Any thoughts?

Here are some ways I can suggest:

Come up with natural, unforced occasions when you can get naked in his presence or at least allow him to see you nude. Changing for bed or getting into the shower.

You may have to ‘set up’ some of these — if it’s something that’s not been any part of your style of living. – Such a ‘set-up’ might be forgetting something like a towel or wash cloth when you’re in the shower, or running out of soap or shampoo and having to come out to get some (or one that you just bought but ‘forget’ to bring with you. – Use your cellphone to ring (set up the alarm to ring) while you’re in the tube and you rush out of the bathroom naked “not knowing he was there” story to grab your phone.

Let him catch you naked a few times innocently. If you are now walking through the house/apartment nude, then it might seem strange to just start doing so. So you first have to get him used to seeing you in various states of undress. Start my coming out with no shirt or lounging around only in your boxes or athletic shorts.

Later try to set up more ‘naked’ situations where he catches you naturally.

This might be his knocking on your bedroom door (to get something you borrowed or that you share – cordless phone, vacuum cleaner, etc). (if you have separate bedrooms) and you’re nude doing something like trying to untie some knotted shoelaces (and you may have the stereo/TV on) or headphones on (so you can’t him knock).

Other ideas:

1) Start freeballing – that way you’ll already be half naked. Your roommate will get used to seeing your cock, balls and butt if you undress where he can see.

2) If he’s too uptight, he’ll keep looking away or even ask you to dress in your own room. They will give you clues about how to proceed.

3) If this avoidance behavior persists, especially if he mentions it or draws some attention to it (like leaving the room), you could confront him about his being too uptight or too restrictive on your own personal freedom.

4) If he jokes about it, then you could also joke back with him.. ‘Try it out, you might like it’. Just be upfront (and clever).. ” seeing me naked doesn’t bother you, does it?” How would he answer that but say ‘No, not at all.”

5) Start a new activity that involves him and you — and the possibility of nudity – swimming for fitness, gym, fitness club, yoga, weekend sports, jogging, weekend trips or day time outing to the lake, beach, etc.

6) Always sleep in the nude so it won’t be strange for you to be naked in and around your bedroom, also when you and he get to do some overnight trips or camping, etc.

7) Get a friend who is a nudist and whom you visit with your roommate. The friend can invite you and your friend to get naked (whether he’s gay or straight or with a woman) the ‘pressure’ of your friend’s request might help him to break down the barriers so he’ll actually get nude too. At least, you can accept your nudist friend’s invitation – so you’ll be naked in front of your roomie.

You could do something so innocent as:

A) meet in the in-house bar/restaurant for drinks or snack,

B) come visit him in his dorm room  or apartment,  and then get around to getting somebody naked – either one of our ‘cmnm’ group or maybe some of the other guys staying in the room (is that unethical?) — maybe? But it could be a whole lot of fun.

3) Hold a party in the room and play strip poker (or an easier kind of game where the loser has to remove a piece clothing until some (or all are naked).

4) More clever would be for several of your group staying in the same or nearby rooms and then pretending not to know each other.. .. so we can get some going like one guy jerking off in his bunk, and then another guy (our member joining in). It would get some of the other guys (not our group) horny and they would join in the fun… Maybe a little farfetched… but you never know until you try. Outside the hostel… it’s very large and could be very crowded

5) Try doing some naked dares and having buddies to watch out / bring your clothes to a rendezvous point, or take photos, etc. …

6) You might try going to a bar/club where nudity is either allowed or required

7) Perhaps some one would be willing to host a small group in his apartment, office lounge after hours..etc, for some naked fun.

8) Another idea is to have pre-selected roles for a type of simulation – visit to a doctor’s for an exam. One guys in the patient, another two play the role of physician and or specialist, there could be a male nurse who gives sponge baths.  It’s up to your imagination.


Am I losing you here? There are other roles that come to mind.. but it takes a bit of energy, a passion for realism but with a big dose of fantasy, and a suitable place where that could happen.

I hope you’re able to get off with a guy if one of these tactics works.

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Tommy’s Only Crime Was That He Was Cute

Tommy’s Only Crime Was That He Was Cute

Tommy had recently run away from home. He was living on the city streets. He had found a lane way to live with a box becoming his new home. One night he turned into his lane way to sleep for the

night and he found two policemen, their car parked at the other end of the lane. Tommy wondered what was going on as the cops approached him. “Now what’s a cute boy like yourself doing out this late at night?”, queried the large muscular cop with a beard. “I, I, I..” Tommy stammered. The words wouldn’t come out of his mouth, he was dazed. Before he knew it, the other cop was at his side and had taken his arm. The big cop that reminded Tommy of a bear, was at his other side, his huge hand uncomfortably stroking Tommy’s chest. “I think you just better do as we say”, said the bear-cop. Tommy could feel the bear’s hot breath against his cheek. They walked Tommy back a few steps and placed him on the bonnet of the patrol car. “Now, take off your clothes”. Tommy was frightened and did as he was told.

The cops’ eyes lit up when Tommy removed his pants and they could see his dick. Each cop took hold of one of Tommy’s legs and spread them wider across the bonnet. Then they clambered at his cock to get to suck it first. Tommy felt as if this was all a dream. He was still frightened so went with what was happening. Plus,the way in which the policemen were stimulating his dick sort of felt good. The thinner cop with a moustache moved up behind Tommy while the bear-cop flipped him over to his knees. “Now suck it”, ordered the thin cop. Tommy found a long, thin hard cock staring him in the face. Hesitating at first he began sucking at the man’s penis. The cop began to groan each time Tommy retracted his mouth along the shaft. It was then that Tommy noticed the tickling sensation around his ass hole.

The bear-cop was playing with Tommy’s cute ass. But then he felt a searing burning and splitting sensation. He felt as if someone had forced a huge, red hot poker inside him. Tommy yelled in pain but the cops held him in place. “Keep sucking. Don’t stop or we’ll do worse to you”, threatened the thin cop. Even though Tommy thought the pain in his ass was unbearable and felt like no other pain he had experienced before, he could feel his own dick had grown and was rigidly bouncing between his legs as he was being invaded from behind…

Gay cartoon’s can be better than the real thing at

Gay Asian Porn Kings

Posted on: March 27, 2009

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My secret life as a flasher

It amazes me that I can walk down the street on any morning of the week wearing a mesh athletic pants (liner removed) and never get a stare. I’ve been getting a little more daring but still most people are just oblivious.

I know when I am out walking or going somewhere, my eyes are constantly on the ‘crotch watch’ and looking at guys’ butts. I guess that’s is part of what makes me (I’m surely not alone here) work differently.

Well, I sort of got a look for a guy in a passing car. He was working in the cemetery so saw him a minute later but he was not alone. I chickened out of strolling by — he was busy. It’s getting cooler so the mesh pants won’t work too much longer.

I have been asked where I got these pants. I know several online underwear/sportwear stores have them but those are more expensive and more see-thru than you might need.

I found these at either Walmart or Kmart – but Sears or JCPenny, etc would have them – although more expensive. (US but I’m sure there are equivalent stores in the UK and Australia – I’m not sure about continental Europe, however, they are probably manufactured in China, so they’re likely to be found anywhere.

They are in men’s athletic or

sportswear section. Sometimes you can find a bargain price.

Check the size of the mesh on the outer layer. Some have a very tiny mesh but these were a larger weave – allowing more visibility. If you can take out the lining only on the front of the pants – so that when heads turn the pants will look like ordinary ones. If you lucky enough to be noticed, then at least they can just wonder if they really saw your cock or just the illusion of it.

Being a closet flasher I enjoy wearing my mesh shorts or athletic pants (liner removed) outdoors. Amazingly however, I rarely get noticed — even when I don’t wear a long shirt that would cover up the fact that I’m freeballing and hanging loose. There are different sized mesh weaves so the amount of transparency varies on the garment and whether it’s sunny or cloudy (amount of light) affects how see-thru they appear.

For the first time in a pretty long while, I actually did get noticed. I went out about 7 a.m. the other day wearing my long mesh pants to take a morning walk — without my dog. Lately I’ve been taking the dog out and hour or so later than that.

Along came someone on a bicycle who I’ve seen in the neighborhood before but haven’t for a long time. He’s a gardener / landscaper who works at a nursery nearby. I remember him because he’s used come early to pick up the company truck parked in a lot across from where I live. He would arrive on his bicycle and then proceed to stand sideways out in front the parked vehicle and take a long piss (just about every morning). I had noticed this habit – not because I was spying on him – but I’d see him when I came out to get the paper, looked out the window, He was apparently not deliberately exposing himself — at least from my viewpoint. Yet I always wondered if he were sort of doing it on purpose. If he’s coming to work by bicycle, his own place couldn’t be that far away. For a year or so, his company uses a different parking lot for their vehicles so I’ve not seen him taking a morning piss.

Well, that other morning, as he rode passed me on his bicycle his eyes centered in on my freeballing cock in these mesh pants which was just hanging partly below my shirt. He turned in from a side road and so his view of it was just a short glance, but he definitely reacted. Because he had earphones on, as was listening to music, he could not heard himself but I heard him mumbled just as he passed me ‘goddamn! or something like that, doing a double take.

Somehow I don’t think he was not as shocked as he was surprised – maybe even delighted — that there was somebody in his neighborhood he would do what he’s been thinking about so long (his pissing in public was just his way of innocent flashing). So I now I think he might have been getting his own thrills as he ‘innocently’ pissed in public ever morning.

I know there are many — if not most freeballers – who do wear no underwear for a lot different reasons than the thrill of accident exposure. But I think there might at least be a element of thrill of being seen for a good many — even showing a VPL (visible penis line) through your pants/short that are NOT mesh must be appealing to some freeballers. Wearing mesh and semi-transparent or see-thru or ripped clothes with holes while freeballing is more further step along in that direction.

By the way, beside mesh pants/short does anybody get off wearing ripped jeans? I’ve got some old ones I cut off as short but they are full of holes in the crotch so somebody can get a look at skin and maybe more when I wearing them while freeballing.

On a morning walk in the cemetery a few days back, I pulled off my pants – always wear a loose fitting cargo pants and freeball. So it’s easy to quickly do a bit of ‘stealth flashing’ — I call it ‘stealth’ since I don’t believe anybody is watching. It’s just the fact that they might or could at any moment — there are cars intermittently passing along a lane about 50 m behind me. I got excited and just seconds later starting jerking off until I cum.

Showing ‘face’ when your flashing or ‘innocently’ exposing yourself to strangers is actually less risky than doing so on the Internet. I mean there are only a limited number of people who actually see you and many don’t really ‘see’ you at all. Even if they do, they don’t want to act on it (confront your personally or even call the police and press charges) and then they don’t have ‘proof’ – just their word against yours.

I was once arrested for lewd conduct charges (a felony in Mass). It happened while on vacation near Provincetown in 2005. It was a police who saw me — although I was just ‘pissing,’ which I was, he claimed I was trying to flash him (I was wearing a skimpy see-thru pair of shorts but he could not have seen that from the distance he was when he first noticed me). I was not convicted — of course –the case was dismissed because it was a case of false arrest/police brutality / insufficient evidence / unlawful seizure of evidence (my camera), I obtain the services of a local lawyer who had experience with theis particular police department. It seems they often made this kinds of arrest in order to discourage ‘perverts’ from coming into their community – -not Provincetown township but another one further down (south) the Cape.

But the whole trauma of the experience taught me some valuable lessons. For one, it made me realize how vindictive and self-rightheous some people are — including well-meaning and hardworking police officers — most of whom I have a great deal of respect for the dedication.

But flashing on the net or letting your face get shown may have some risks that you cannot control or may not even realize until years later.

Thanks, Toras, for being encouraging without be condescending. I have lived in communities where a Causasian male (which I am ) is a rare minority , so it means I would have no trouble being picked out of a police line-up. Toronto has a very multi-ethnic community – there are about 800,000 people of Chinese origin alone live in great Toronto — at least you can ‘pass’ for a local. I can’t where I am living now – that’s why I guess I went overboard last summer and was a little bit too careless while vacationing on Cape Cod. I thought I blended in as to be unrecognizable.

The other interesting phenomena and also could make flashing (exposing one’s genitals and face) on the Internet somewhat riskier for people who define themselves as flashers, exhibitionists and exposers is

1) the tendency for the Christian right to categorize them as sex offenders — the same as child rapists and baby killers, and

2) the new Internet technologies for tagging pics, passing data including pics and tags through RSS feeds even further around the globe, and geotagging – ties/links an Internet object (user, picture, file) to a specific geographic spot.

I know this is off-topic , but it was my topic (Walking the Dog) in the first place so I doubt the moderator’s will mind. I usually do a lot of thinking while I am ‘walking the dog’ which is both a methophor for ‘wagging the wiener’, freeballing in the open air, airing out the family jewels. But it also is REALLLY what I am doing — taking my pet dog for his daily walks. I also think about flashing both as my hobby and also about it repercussions and consequences too – while I’m enjoying the solitude and occasional chance to peek-flash some guy (see separate, earlier posts for the narratives)

Back the thesis —

We know there is tracking of what you purchase and even what you’re interested in (sites that you have visited leave cookies that search engines can pick up and then display ads that are related to the types of sites (products) you’ve been visiting. Google does that big time.

So it’s not too big of a stretch to think that pics (or other data files or media objects), which you download or that you place on your website or public / private profile on some social network, or that you even look at briefly online, might leave discernible and followable traces.

I’ve got profiles all over the net and many pics with and without my face — both under my real name and my various alias (sunbuns is not my 9-5 working world identity). Someday somebody is going to find a way (my conspiracy instinct says they already have) to collect these traces (tags) or at least connect them like dots. So they’ll start selling the information (klandestinely of course) for ostensibly purposes of security and anti-criminal protection but the personal id info will most certainly also be used to defame and try to ruin the reputations of people (basically good upstanding citizens — like me and you) for political gain, religious cleansing, or profit from blackmail or pay-offs.

Sorry to take a sinister lapse into the dark side of the net…

Hey, it’s my real birthday today. I’m 39 – yep! Well, at least ‘sunbuns’ thinks he is or at least won’t admit to being any older than that – and he usually says he’s younger). I remember a comment your once made in another posting — most of the people on this site (who are interesting in or doing flashing) are in the 40s and 50s.

In honor of the fact that I’m chicken to show my face here’s another pic — not only faceless but too headless from one my walking-the-dog hikes into the local cemetery. If I get any more ‘invisible’ – I might as well be dickless. Sometimes I think it will be good to be reborn as a dickless being (a female?) in my next life.

If I am not recognizable, may be my dog will be.

Kelly (sunbuns)

On the public profiles, I was referring to in my post above is located at Dlist — a gay social networking site (I feel like a ‘old’ man among the ‘twinkish’ – hipster GQ types plastered all over the home page. But what the hell — I like college age dudes – and sometimes they like a guy who’s more mature and obviously well-endowed (I don’t mean ‘big’ dicked).


If you visit it, you can see a slide show of guys showing off in public.

Which means that ANYONE can see the photo and the profile – if someone is savvy enough they can probably find out my IP address from the uploaded pics or code. So — it’s not all just conspiracy. Someday I’ll be knowledgeable enough to prove my thesis by showing you exactly how it might work.

I collect such pics and thousands of others. I am turned on more by ‘real’ photos of real guys getting nude and being naked, male and happy about it, than the slick, hard-glossed superstuds and huge meaty cocks of the porno models.

I have them in Flickr and a few thousand save in Yahoo Photos – only friends can see them – unlike Dlist and GW – my profiles and pics are password protected. I realize it is not much security (protecting one’s identity from theft or blackmailing/blackballing) but usually like-minded people of the same persuasion join a gay or porno site. That’s not the case with these two new entries, GW and Dlist. Even Yahoo 360, MySpace and don’t allow just anyone to see a profile (or at least the parts you don’t want made public).

I am pasting the link the slideshow below and I’ll try to embed the player here too (if HTML for the slide show doesn’t work into this post, then you can see it at my JustUsBoys profile at the link below:

That’s what I’ve heard — but I don’t have any light colored ones to test that out. Of course, it matters how much direct light (sunlight) there is and the width of the mesh opening, how reflective the material is too.

I was a rare treat — not only getting buck naked on a public beach — but improvising a dildo out of a cucumber I stopped and bought on the way to the beach. Wish you’d been there to view me — it’s a sometimes cruisy area where guys go out to sun themselves nude, but frequently there is sex play (mutual – not just alone like mine) in and among the brush and low dunes. Local fisherman often come up along the beach and stay for a long time. Tourists and people out enjoying the beach could have caught me dickflashing with the anal toy inserted. Keep me hard — I saved cumming for a little later trip back closer to Waikiki (where more secretive nudity and male-to-male cruising goes on.

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